I’m level 277 in Gods Unchained the card game, which means I’ve basically earned a PhD in pixelated vengeance. It’s the most fun I’ve had destroying people legally.

Apparently, investing in your 40s is just pretending you’re responsible while secretly spiraling. I did it for 24 years, and now I’m a millionaire—go figure.

Adulting is hard. Like, emotionally-spiraling-in-a-Trader-Joe’s-parking-lot hard. This brutally honest (and disturbingly relatable) guide will walk you through the chaos of pretending to function—with zero judgment and at least one clean pair of socks.

Ever hated someone so much you wanted them to sit through Eraserhead? Here’s the ultimate list of cursed movies to emotionally sabotage your enemies—legally.

Professionalism is just rage in a collared shirt. Here are five email phrases that let you hate someone’s guts—without breaching HR policy.

Adulting isn’t a skill—it’s a performance. From pretending you understand taxes to cleaning like you’re hiding a body, here’s your darkly funny survival guide to faking functional adulthood without sobbing in public (too often).